Will the confidence help me make money
Strengthen self-confidence as a woman
Men sometimes behave like Neanderthals: they romp and scream, make threatening gestures or even get violent. With such behavior from the Stone Age, even men who are not as seasoned as I am faced with fear - which is the purpose of this threatening behavior.
However, for women raised to be gentle and indulgent from an early age, who were not raised to defend themselves like boys, such men are an absolute nightmare. Women usually feel completely helpless in such a situation and feel guilty for provoking the wrath of the "gods" and falling out of favor with them.
Men then use the Neanderthal in themselves as a "weapon" when all other attempts to get their way through have failed. Apart from dealing with the physical superiority of men, many women have not learned how to behave towards aggressive and noisy people, and so men mostly achieve what they want with this behavior.
How do you behave towards a Neanderthal man?
Just like with an elephant. You give it a lot of space and avoid it. If your husband screams and threatens, it is best if you leave the room or apartment. This may make him act like a savage, but there is no other way - unless you wear the black belt in karate.
It is impossible to reasonably speak to someone who is beside yourself, and any attempt can only result in you pouring new oil on the fire. The best thing is to wait until the other has calmed down and can think clearly again.
But what to do if your husband has a tendency to get violent? An alarmingly high percentage of women (30% to 40% is assumed) are regularly ill-treated by beatings, bullying and psychological terror. Why don't these women do anything? Why don't they abandon their flogging husbands? There are several reasons for this: Due to their traditional understanding of roles, women are generally more willing to keep the marriage at any cost.
Another reason is often financial and the associated uncertain future. Since many women are still financially dependent, they cannot just pack their bags and move out. They do not feel able to cope with life on their own. The claim of many women to have to offer their children an intact parental home also plays a role here.
On the other hand, in my opinion, it is doing the children a greater service to let them grow up without a father than to keep them watching the parents quarrel and the father beating up the mother.
In the event that your husband is also violent, I recommend that you have an emergency kit ready in which you have everything ready for you to leave the apartment immediately. Find out about women's shelters in your city, make an agreement with a friend whose name and address your husband does not know (!) That you can stay with her for a night or two. Set aside some money to keep yourself afloat for a few days.
If your husband has hit you repeatedly and you don't want to come back to him the "next time," then prepare for a night-and-fog action: Lift off yours the day you want to leave him joint account off as much as possible. If you do not have a joint account or if your husband denies you access to his account, then take everything from your apartment that you can monetize (jewelry, pictures, silver cutlery, etc.), go to a pawn shop and transfer it it.
Sentimentality is out of place here!
It's about your life and your dignity as a person. Leave the apartment while he is at work, take a room in a cheap guesthouse or youth hostel and immediately start looking for an apartment or see if you can find accommodation in a women's refuge. The most important thing, however, is: do not give your address to anyone your husband knows and whose confidentiality you cannot 100% rely on.
You can leave your husband a message that you have left him, but under no circumstances - no matter how much he begs and vows to improve - give him your new address. You would make the biggest mistake of your life.
The Weißer Ring association can be of great help - even financially. This association, which has over 400 branches nationwide, helps women in need.
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