Why is it bad to be flat

111 great jokes to make you laugh - for every sense of humor

We have 111 jokes to make you laugh in 11 categories from flat to self-deprecating. This way you can quickly find funny jokes on any topic and guarantee a few laughs in your circle of friends. Let yourself be inspired, there is something for every humor.

Jokes that make you laugh are healthy

Jokes that make you laugh are healthy

In fact, laughing jokes contradict what they do. Of course, you don't die of laughing, it's actually very healthy and not only good for our psyche, but also for our body. Jokes transport us for a moment into a happy world in which we can laugh at things that we otherwise see critically or that cause us concern. This can either be your own failure, such as losing weight that just doesn't work, or it can be related to marital problems that some can identify with. A lot of jokes are also simply clichés that everyone can use to imagine something.

Physical benefits are that laughing strengthens the immune system, releases endorphins, and if you laugh heartily for 10 minutes, you burn 50 calories. Laughing can even relieve pain and, according to studies, can help you live longer. Even if you just smile, it will release happiness hormones and lower your blood pressure by giving your body a feeling of contentment.

111 jokes to make you laugh for every occasion

111 jokes to make you laugh for every occasion

We have put together a lot of laughable jokes in a wide variety of categories for you. So the next time you are in a good mood with your friends, you can tell a funny joke, simply send it via WhatsApp or set it as a status. Below you will find jokes from a wide variety of categories: puns, flat jokes, jokes about Germany and German clichés, self-deprecating jokes, this-moment jokes, short jokes, student jokes, Kevin and Chantal jokes, jokes for birthday, parents and technology and jokes about couples and married couples. There is something for every sense of humor! You can find more guaranteed funny jokes here.

Puns to die for

The following laughable jokes are word games. Sometimes it takes a moment for them to really understand them. The differences are mostly in a different reading, pronunciation or intonation. The joke “Tried to tell a redhead jokes about redheads yesterday. He didn't think it was so funny and then Ginger. ”For example, it's only funny if you don't read“… and then he went. ”But“ Ginger ”- the English word for a redhead. Word jokes are therefore often easier to understand in written form and are therefore particularly suitable for sending them on WhatsApp, Facebook and Co.

  1. It took 25 years for me to understand that Frucht-Tiger is an increase in fruity ... It will never be the same again. # fruity tiger quenches thirst and it comes on
  2. Tried to tell a redhead joke about redheads yesterday. He didn't think it was that funny and then Ginger.
  3. Heard Bushido wants to buy AirBerlin. The new airline will then be called Airsguterjunge.
  4. What do mushrooms do on a pizza? Act as a covering.
  5. Quickly write Nutella backwards again before everyone does it!
  6. When I ask my dog ​​what I look like, he says WAU. That's why I love him.
  7. I have agreed with the plant to water it only once a month. She agreed to it.
  8. What is green and is coming? - A lettuce salad.
  9. A programmer is asked by his wife: “Please go to the store and buy a loaf of bread. If the eggs have, bring a dozen. ”The programmer comes back with 12 loaves of bread.
  10. I am very good at dealing with people.

Flat jokes to laugh at

Flat jokes to laugh at

These jokes are so bad they're good again. They are also known as "thigh knockers". That means that they are quite simple and plain, some of them may even be really bad, but still achieve their goal: we laugh. But why do we laugh at bad jokes?

Let's take the example: “Do you know what the hammer is? - A tool."

The confusing moment lies in a small article. If one were asked: “You know what a Hammer is? ”Probably everyone would answer:“ A tool. ”But because a certain article is used, the listener of this question assumes that it is colloquially a great event. The real joke is the surprising and sobering answer that only a tool was meant and nothing exciting happened.

When we hear a joke like this, there are two possibilities that might hit our humor, or it's a combination of both. On the one hand, one can laugh about the fact that the answer was simply blunt and one would not have expected it. On the other hand, one can laugh at the person who tells this "bad" joke and basically embarrasses himself with it. Whoever tells the joke can laugh too because they have duped their listeners

  1. I never used to understand why it was called the St. Andrew's Cross. I know today. It signals: STOP STOP! Thanks to RTL2.
  2. I dropped a yogurt. It was no longer tenable.
  3. You: "And what is your favorite film?"
    He: "Tape is a really good strip."
  4. There was an accident in the mascara factory. Fortunately we were able to cover it up.
  5. Do you know what's awesome? - A tool.
  6. You look sick. I'll prescribe you a pizza. With best regards, Dr. Oetker.
  7. What do you call a light mammoth? - Hellmut.
  8. "Crisp, crispy knäuschen, who is nibbling on my lactose-free, vegan, gluten-free, stevia-sweetened fairtrade organic house?"
    - Witch (538), moves with the times to attract people.
  9. What do you call a trained farmer? Farm demiker.
  10. I don't eat all kinds of chips. I'm very fussy about that.

Jokes about Germany and German clichés

Jokes about Germany and German clichés

When Germans laugh at German clichés, it is either because they know exactly what is meant and can identify with it or because they stand out from it but know the clichéd behavior of other Germans. Either way, everyone feels understood because the joke reflects something that is also perceived that way. The fact that only people who live in Germany or have already been there understand this joke correctly creates a kind of insider atmosphere. This feeling speaks to most people's humor even more than general jokes. The exaggeration or condensation of a typically German phenomenon finally makes us laugh.

  1. Four seasons in Germany:
    - Always this cold.
    - Always this pollen.
    - Always this heat.
    - Always this rain.
  2. How does a declaration of love work in northern Germany? Answer: "I am not entirely unsympathetic to you."
  3. Why is there so little work on construction sites in winter? - The beer bottles burst when it is frosty!
  4. A man has an interview at Deutsche Bahn and is 15 minutes late.
    Asks the HR manager: "Do you know that you are 15 minutes late?"
    "Yes and I don't care."
    "You are set!"
  5. Kevin goes to the doctor: "Hello, my name is Kevin."
    Says the doctor: "Hello Kevin."
    Kevin: "I have a problem."
    Doctor: "You already said that."
  6. "On a scale from 1 to 10, how German are you?"
    "May I see your survey authorization certificate first?"
  7. Hell is the place where the English cook, the Italians regulate traffic and the Germans make television entertainment.
  8. I feel like the Weimar Republic. My condition could be better.
  9. In the HR department:
    The manager has a large pile of applications in front of him. He takes the top 20, throws them in the trash and says: "These are unlucky and we can't use people with bad luck here."
  10. In 50 years, our children will be going to parties in 2010 with red sneakers, beards, gym bags and selfie sticks.
  11. I'd make a joke about Deutsche Bahn now, but it wouldn't have arrived.

Self-deprecating jokes to laugh at

Self-deprecating jokes to laugh at

People like to laugh at their weaknesses. By telling jokes about certain mass phenomena or problems, they feel understood and do not take their failure so seriously. If you can laugh at yourself, it increases your self-confidence and you can deal with your problems better. One of these mass phenomena is the failure to lose weight. And because we never give up hope: Here you can lose weight quickly and here a little slower, but healthier!

  1. Name: Sebastian.
    First name: I'm too stupid to fill out forms.
  2. You want to go to the gym, stumble over your own gym bag, tumble on the sofa and tear your sweatpants down again. And at the end of the day, you accidentally order a pizza.
  3. I am probably always tired because so many talents lie dormant in me.
  4. If you had to choose between diet and chocolate, would you choose black, white, or chocolate with whole milk?
  5. Shopping when you are hungry - priceless.
  6. I hate to be asked how my friends would describe me in a job interview because I doubt “stupid junk” will get me the job.
  7. Spilling an already paid for, full alcoholic beverage is the adult version of letting go of a balloon.
  8. A traffic warning on the radio: "Attention, there are three cyclists on the hard shoulder on the A8 in the direction of Munich."
    My first thought: "Which idiot leaves his beer on the hard shoulder?"
  9. There are exactly three things that I always care too much about:
    Hope, thoughts and noodles.
  10. Me: "So, I'll concentrate now and start learning."
    My brain: "Ladies and Gentlemen ..."
    Me: "Oh no, please not again."
    My brain: "This is Mambo Number Five ..."

That moment jokes to die for

That moment jokes to die for

An incredible number of people can identify with this moment jokes. They either describe exactly a situation that everyone knows or are exaggerated, but aptly describe the feeling during this moment. On the internet, those-moment jokes are often accompanied by memes. Memes usually arise from meaningful visual material and spread online very quickly. Combined with text material, they acquire new meanings and offer a lot of fun potential. A popular example is the phrase "Your look when ..." combined with a certain situation and a meme. The following these-moment jokes don't need pictures to be funny. Send them on WhatsApp or other channels and bring your friends to laugh at.

  1. That moment when you don't know exactly how to greet your new acquaintance and then it becomes an embarrassing mixture of high five, shaking hands, hugs, kisses and a backflip.
  2. That moment when you watch a movie with your mother in which a SWAT team storms a house and yells "Clean!" At every room - and she says: "Look, they wouldn't have said that about your room."
  3. That moment when the teacher asks if you've done your homework and you start rummaging around in your backpack to buy time to come up with an excuse.
  4. That moment when you never really wanted to talk to someone again but accidentally do it anyway.
  5. That moment when you have already asked "What?" Three times, still do not understand it and therefore simply agree.
  6. That moment, when you get another terrible present at Christmas, pretend to like it, have a guilty conscience afterwards and at the same time feel ashamed of the other person.
  7. That moment when attendance is checked at school and you nervously prepare for the "yes" beforehand.
  8. That moment when your mother comes into your room, leaves and leaves the door open.
  9. That moment when someone says "Hello", you panic and think you have friends, but the person behind you just answered the phone.
  10. That moment when the teacher walks by during class work and you cover up your answers so he doesn't see how stupid you are.

Short jokes to make you laugh

Short jokes to make you laugh

It never hurts to add a bit of humor or make a friend laugh. The following short jokes are particularly suitable for sending on WhatsApp if you don't want to type long. They are available on all sorts of topics, including a few word games.

Make sure you have a good enough sense of who you are telling the joke to. For example, if you know someone who never tidies their room, you could send them this joke: "Of course I should clean the windows, but privacy is important too." Add funny emojis so that they know for sure that you are not attacking them with it, but just trying to make fun of you.

  1. Of course I would have to clean the windows, but privacy is also important.
  2. The face of the person sitting next to you when you ask him on the flight to Barcelona what he's up to in London - priceless.
  3. Vegans don't have children. They get offspring.
  4. I locked myself out earlier. Was over the moon.
  5. Fritzchen: "You papa, what is an opera."
    Father: "That's when someone gets a knife in the back and instead of dying, they start singing."
  6. An Indian family lives next to me. I just noticed for the first time that your WLAN is called "Indernet".
  7. Why has never been a vegan on the moon? - Because he can't tell anyone that he's vegan.
  8. If little monkeys are called monkeys, what are little maggots called?
  9. "I have a sore throat."
    "You mean a graze."
    "No, I sipped my coffee and burned myself."
  10. What are two angry sheep doing? - You’re getting caught up in it.

Student jokes to die for

Student jokes to laugh at

Laughing jokes often contain a glimmer of truth. So when a student hears a student joke, it offers a high potential for identification. It creates a sense of belonging to a group that makes the student laugh. He knows exactly what is meant. But for others, too, these clichés are funny and easy to understand. Student jokes play with typical student clichés: laziness, constant studying, sleeping in late, lack of money and so on. Jokes about students and professors are just as popular as the classic teacher-student jokes.

  1. Professor to the student: "With what you don't know, two others could fail!"
  2. Who actually found out that it is safe to eat mold cheese? - I think it was a student at the end of the month.
  3. A student runs after an ice cream van with waving arms. He stops.
    "Yes please, what can it be?"
    "Nothing, I just wanted to say that I'm vegan."
  4. "You look tired."
    "Yes, I had a hot night last night."
    "Top floor?"
    "Yup."
  5. I used to think 20 year olds were grown up. That was around the time I thought students were smart.
  6. Laugh, nod, and hope it wasn't a question. You know that.
  7. During the oral exam, the professor greets the student: "Don't we know each other?"
    Then the student: “Yes, I failed the last time, and today I will repeat the exam.” “Aha, what my first question was who last time?” The professor wants to know.
    Then the student: "Don't we know each other?"
  8. Why do students get up at seven o'clock? - Because the supermarket closes at eight.
  9. “What is fraud?” The professor asks the law student.
    "Cheating is when you fail me."
    "Why that?"
    "Because, according to the Criminal Code, someone is guilty of fraud who takes advantage of someone else's ignorance in order to harm them."
  10. “You are already studying medicine in your 16th semester, my son. When do you actually intend to become a doctor? "
    “Oh dad, I purposely take my time with my studies. Most patients simply have more trust in older doctors. "

Funny jokes about Kevin and Chantal

Funny jokes about Kevin and Chantal

Among other things, the film "Kevin - Alone at Home" (1990) inspired many parents to give their sons the name of the title character. In 1991, Kevin was even the most popular first name. The kids of the 90s will understand what is meant. Surely each of them knows a Kevin and the famous Kevin jokes. In addition, “Alpha-Kevin” almost became the youth word of the year in 2015. This term refers to young people who are particularly unintelligent. "Kevin" is used synonymously with stupidity and "Alpha" (from alpha male) is an accentuating increase.

There is even Kevinism and Chantalism, which are amused by the unusual naming. There is often the prejudice here that parents from lower social classes give their children these "exotic" names. However, there are no meaningful statistics on this. Nonetheless, the Kevin and Chantal clichés have firmly established themselves in Germany. The fact that certain names are used as joke material or even as abuse is not new, however. Older examples are Horst, Uschi or Heini (short for Heinrich).

The chantalism has survived to this day and was taken up in the film “Fack ju Göhte”, for example. One of the main roles is played by the character Chantal, who combines all the clichés and makes many people laugh. It is questionable whether people who bear this name can also laugh at it. Blondes are probably also less likely to laugh at blonde jokes. So if you tell a Kevin or Chantal joke, limit it to your circle of friends so that there are no conflicts. Your friends can judge you and know your kind of humor.

  1. What were Kevin's toughest ten years? - Primary school.
  2. Peter: "Super Kevin!"
    Kevin: "Thanks!"
    Peter: "Kevin SUPER!"
    Kevin: "Yes, thank you. :) "
    Peter: "That's diesel, damn Kevin, you should take super!"
  3. Asks the teacher, "What is half of six?"
    Kevin: "Half past five."
  4. Kevin screwed the bus driver. He bought a ticket and got off again.
  5. "What's your name?"
    "Kevin."
    "Oh wow, I'm sorry."
  6. Weddings in 10 years: “And so I ask you, Jeremy-Pascal: Do you want to take the present Chantal to your Bae, love and honor her, share 1 life with her, in GZ and SZ, based on marriage? Then give me 1 like now. "
  7. "Chantal, is the indicator working?"
    "Yes. Wait no But now again. No. Yes. No. Yes. No."
  8. My biggest fear is that at some point grandparents will no longer be Elfriede and Heinz, but Chantal and Kevin.
  9. In the past: "Anyone who writes with an H is stupid."
    Today: “Anyone who writes with H is at least holding the pen around correctly. Well done, Chantal. "
  10. Pessimist: The glass is half empty.
    Optimist: The glass is half full.
    Kevin: You can drink with a glass.
    Chantal: What glass?

Funny sayings and jokes for birthday

Funny sayings and jokes for birthday

Why not congratulate you funny? In WhatsApp groups in particular, you often feel bad when you write the same thing as everyone else. Or: You write so seldom with one person that the chat consists exclusively of reciprocal birthday greetings. A change wouldn't be bad at all. The only requirement is that you should know the person relatively well in order to be able to congratulate them with a birthday joke. She should share your humor because the following birthday jokes are more sarcastic. You can find more funny sayings here.

  1. Woohooo! A to the L to the L to the E to the S to the G to the U to the T to the E to the Z to the U to the M to the G to the E to the B to the U to the R to the T to the S to the T to the A to the G!
  2. Happy Birthday. Without you, it would be like you weren't there.
  3. I too would like to express my appreciation to you on the anniversary of your delivery.
  4. Voucher for a congratulation.
  5. Ok, it's good, happy birthday - and now I'm nervous, I'll see you at your party. HdgdlbzMuz
  6. I congratulate you on your birthday. May proper craftsmen pave your way and never rip you off.
  7. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet.
  8. For a birthday this rhyme - you should always be happy and cheerful.
  9. One year older, just WOW!
  10. All OMG
    Good WTF
    to the HDL
    Birthday LOL

Jokes to laugh at about parents and technology

Jokes to laugh at about parents and technology

Everyone knows it: Most parents simply cannot cope with new technical phenomena. The 50 plus generation in particular has enormous problems making friends with them. What is completely natural and logical for us is a great challenge for parents and grandparents. That makes it all the more fun for the children. Jokes about parents and technology are more suitable for the younger generation and certainly hit the humor of most, as they are not nasty or macabre, but often almost cute. In addition, almost everyone can identify with such situations.

  1. Touched a thousand times, nothing happened a thousand times.
    Mom (50) can't get along with her smartphone.
  2. "We can now write SMS."
    "Mblambatoya"
    "Hahaha, the best first SMS ever!"
    "What does that mean now?"
    "Mblambatoya"
  3. "I didn't do anything, it was like that."
    Either the reaction of children who broke something or of parents on the computer.
  4. "I wish you‘ dead dead dead for the exam! ’"
    - Mom and the autocorrect
  5. "Hey dad, how are you?"
    Papa writes ...
    writes ...
    writes ...
    "October!"
  6. "Hey mom, how are you doing with your first smartphone?"
    "How does one blank"
  7. "Hurray, I have a one in math!"
    "WTF !!!"
    "Mummy? What do you think what WTF means? "
    "Wow, totally fantastic!"
  8. "Hey dad, heard you have a smartphone now, hope it's all good."
    "FltnZV"
    "Practice creates masters!"
    "Lower Saxony"
  9. Mother: “Please stop changing the Google logo all the time. I like the original. "
    Son: "Mom, I'm not changing the logo, Google will do it!"
    Mother: "On my computer ??? You don't decide what the logo looks like? "
    Son: "If I decided, I would drive a different car."
  10. Mother: "Hello space bar Nadine exclamation mark space bar capital letter What space bar do space bar you question mark"
    Daughter: "Hi mom, that's the voice input, you don't need to speak the space, the app does that itself."
    Mother: "I cucumber letter pea Ritalin."
    Daughter: "Mom! Please stop and just type your messages !!! "

Funny jokes about couples and married couples

Funny jokes about couples and married couples

You can tell jokes about couples either to your friends or to couples yourself. Many of them play stereotypes with gender roles or make fun of marriage. Some of the following jokes might even make fun toasts for weddings or anniversaries. For some jokes, you could just replace the names with the names of your friends and relate them to a personal situation. Make sure, however, that your joke is not misunderstood. You could even write a joke like this on a wedding card:

The wife comes into a wine shop. “Which wine would you recommend for the 10th wedding anniversary?” - “It all depends. Do you want to celebrate the time together or take revenge on him? "

In this case, add your own text and refer to the joke: "Dear married couple, I wish you for the future that there will be no reason for revenge and that you will spend the next 10 years of marriage happy and content."

  1. My wife wants to talk to me about my childish behavior. - Well, she won't get into my pillow castle without the secret word.
  2. My girlfriend thinks I'm too curious. But well, that was only in her diary. That's why it doesn't have to be right for a long time.
  3. A woman calls her husband: “You honey, I can't start the car. I think there is water in the air filter. "
    "Are you sitting in the car right now?"
    "Yes."
    "Where are you now?"
    "In the little stream behind our house."
  4. Elder couple:
    "You Karl-Heinz, I can't sleep."
    "Karl-Heinz: Evil never sleeps."
  5. Juliet: "Hey Romeo, what are we doing tonight?"
    Romeo: "I follow you."
  6. Egon tells his friend: "My dog ​​used to greet me with loud barks and my wife brought me the slippers."
    Paul asks: "How is it today?"
    "You have swapped."
  7. The wife comes into a wine shop. "Which wine would you recommend for the 10th wedding anniversary?"
    "It depends. Do you want to celebrate the time together or take revenge on him? "
  8. "You Marita, imagine your husband is telling everyone that he leads a dog's life at home."
    "Well that's true too. He comes into the house with dirty feet, makes himself comfortable in front of the oven and waits for the food. "
  9. We have been married for 20 years now. Can't we just be joy?
  10. "Honey, do you think she is prettier than me?"
    "So at her age you were clearly prettier."
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