Is it possible to respect without love

Respect: 6 tips for more appreciation in everyday life

One of the goals of every human being is to be respected. Regardless of whether at work or privately, respect is important so that you feel valued as a person. We'll show you what to look out for in order to gain respect.

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Respect is not the same as respect

Respect is used as a synonym for many different qualities such as recognition, courtesy, awe and appreciation. Depending on the situation, respect can have threatening overtones. For example, if you have respect for dogs, it means that you are more cautious and cautious in this regard and prefer to avoid dogs. In another case, you can use it in the context of respect, such as showing respect to someone for running a marathon. You can also respect someone's behavior when they made a decision that you don't approve of but still accept.

Respect: a basic human need

Respect: a basic human need

The feeling of being respected is a basic human need and is even protected by the Basic Law, because a decent life is based on social recognition. Our society is built on this thought and is based on showing mutual respect. Even in kindergarten and school, children learn to treat each other with respect and also to respect their teachers and supervisors. It is also important that they are shown respect by these authority figures so that the children can appreciate themselves and their abilities.

A lack of respect can severely impair self-esteem, because disrespect is usually expressed through disregard, insult and disregard. How much you respect someone depends on a number of factors. This can affect his social environment, as well as his education and property. Mostly it is people who radiate something that are respected by others. Which factor is most valued differs from person to person.

This is how you gain respect

For a respectful togetherness you have to observe many values. If you want to gain respect for yourself, you have to act a little differently in each area of ​​your life. We have summarized the most important topics.

Respect in everyday work

Respect in the workplace

In professional life, everyone wants to be valued and respected for their work. If you start a new job, you probably have to earn this respect first. Mutual respect is a basic requirement for a pleasant working atmosphere, mutual trust and willingness to make decisions. Mostly young people in particular gain respect through performance, but as an employee you should also bring other qualities with you in order to gain respect from colleagues and the boss.

  • Critical ability: In order to be respected, you should be positive about constructive criticism. Only through criticism do you have the chance to improve your skills and expand your knowledge. You should accept criticism and be open to suggestions for improvement. If you react defensively and are perhaps even offended, it makes a negative impression and your performance is less respected.
  • Initiative: In order to give a good picture of yourself and to be respected, you should actively get involved in the action. Try to propose your own ideas and take responsibility. Be reliable and don't be afraid to make decisions. Interest and initiative are well received in the world of work and increase your appreciation on the part of your colleagues and the employer.
  • Steadfastness: It is also important that you stand by your mistakes, decisions and values. Often it is better to be honest than to talk yourself out of a wrong decision. Hold on to your points of view, even if you are opposing the masses. This is how you stand out. However, it can happen that this behavior does not go down well with everyone. If you gain respect, it does not mean that you are sympathetic to all colleagues, but you have definitely secured their respect.

Respect as a leader

If you are in the management floor, you should bring a lot more with you in addition to the characteristics mentioned. In addition to the appropriate know-how, good assertiveness is particularly important in order to gain respect from your employees. A low level of assertiveness can be interpreted as a weakness, especially in the management floor. It is important that you are steadfast and not give in too easily. However, show empathy, especially when it comes to complaints. Only when your employee feels understood and taken seriously is it possible to find a satisfactory solution.

In order to gain respect as a manager, you should also take responsibility for your actions and those of your employees. Decisions made under your leadership are your responsibility. Therefore, do not pass the responsibility on to your employees, but address possible misconduct in a one-to-one conversation so as not to embarrass your employees. Respect is mutual.

You should also appear confident in order to be respected by your employees. Pay attention to your impact, your body language and gestures when you talk to your employees. Don't try to get serious criticism too harsh or too lax either. Good communication skills can help you with this. Be factual and never get on the personal level when expressing criticism. This is how you keep the respect of your employees.

Respect as a female manager

Women have a particularly difficult time on the executive floor, because they are still often said to have clichés such as a lack of assertiveness. If they take action, however, they are considered bitchy. If, on the other hand, they are too soft, their management style can quickly be perceived as a feminine cuddle course. Women are often said to have a social component, while men are said to be more competitive.

The Equal Opportunities Officer at the Bielefeld University of Applied Sciences, Hilde Schumacher-Grub, has examined this phenomenon and has actually come to the conclusion that women are more likely to speak on an equal footing with their employees, while men emphasize their leadership position. Men and women also differ in their communication with one another. If men are among themselves, they usually keep a certain body distance. If, on the other hand, you speak to a woman, you take up a lot of space. Women can also slip down the flirting track when talking to the opposite sex.

However, if you want to gain respect, you should avoid making a distinction between men and women when it comes to your employees. You should keep your own individual leadership style. A social leadership style on par with your employees is no worse than an authoritarian style. However, do not be afraid to do so if you have to take action. It is important that you implement your tasks satisfactorily and achieve a good result together with your employees. Then you will be respected in any case.

Respect in the partnership

Respect in the partnership

Respect is a fundamental building block of any relationship, but the mutual appreciation can sometimes decrease over the course of the relationship. Especially after a long marriage, it can happen that you take your partner for granted. However, you should work on a good relationship every day. This includes listening carefully to your partner when they talk about their day or plan activities together. However, if you only live in front of yourselves and have nothing more to say to each other, this can be a sign that you no longer respect yourself enough.

In a partnership, you should try to accept your partner for who they are. You shouldn't avoid conflicts, but try to solve them together with your partner. The point of view and opinion of the other should also be listened to and respected. There are many ways you can show respect for your partner. Just a simple compliment can make each other's day a little nicer. Meals eaten together and small, personal gifts also have a positive effect on the relationship. Make your partner feel important and give them your time.

Make sure that your partner also gives you the feeling that you are respected. If you want to work on your relationship and nothing comes back, it can be very painful. Keep in mind that mutual respect is important for you to be happy in your partnership for a long time. If you respect yourself, you should also be in a respectful love relationship.

What is disrespectful behavior?

A lack of respect can manifest itself in different behaviors. Young people in particular tend to push the boundaries of their legal guardians, but they also often behave disrespectfully towards one another. This disrespect can be expressed through words but also through physical attacks. Verbal abuse and abusive gestures are signs of a lack of respect. In the worst case, disrespect can be expressed through bullying and violence like a fight. As a result, the rights of the other person are disregarded and he is humiliated physically and psychologically.

Even little things can be signs of a lack of respect. For example, if you don't let the other person have their say during a conversation, it can come across as disrespectful to them. Another example of disrespectful behavior would be if you repeatedly criticize the other person illegally and make them bad. With this behavior you oppress the other while you put yourself above them. Furthermore, a lack of admission of guilt can also be a sign of disrespect, for example if your partner does not apologize for wrongdoing.

Disrespect always occurs when two or more people are treated unequally, for example when one puts himself above the other, puts him down and only criticizes him. This creates a hierarchy that is particularly unhealthy for love relationships.

How to deal with disrespect

How to deal with disrespect

If you experience disrespect, you are likely to feel unjustly treated and humiliated. However, not all disrespect is meant as such. Many people do not perceive their behavior as disrespectful, even though it appears that way to others. Therefore, you should stay calm first. If the disrespectful person is only a casual acquaintance, it is often better to overlook the wrongdoing and avoid that person in the future. If, on the other hand, you have to deal with her more often, think about what might have led to this behavior before you bring it up.

In the next step, you should point out to your counterpart that you feel disrespectful because of their behavior. It doesn't matter whether the other person is your boss, your partner or a friend, if you feel that you are being treated disrespectfully, you should speak to them. Make sure, however, that you behave respectfully to yourself and do not offend the other. If the other person does not see his disrespectful behavior, you should draw conclusions and keep your distance. Do not let yourself be made small, but keep your self-confidence and your dignity.

Tip: More knowledge in your everyday life with Blinkist

At your Personality development the Blinkist app supports you compact summaries of the best non-fiction books to read and listen to. Capture the key messages of the most important literature on the topic in just 15 minutes!

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